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X by leingad
by leingad

This is awesome! The positioning in the frame, the colours, the structure, the lighting is all beautiful! This photo would very much ma...

XII by leingad
by leingad

Beautifully casual. The contrast is perfect. The focus on the girl and the blur of the background are perfect. It doesnt "pop" but it i...

How to get there, tell me plz by ateist-kleranty

This photo is stunning. The time of day, lining of the trees, bridge, and calm setting of the reflection in the water is absolutely phe...

by Skyriaa

This is a classic picture with many meanings! The combination of objects are somewhat relatable, but There is no main focus. The object...


Artist | Student | Photography
United States
-- (Tumblr)

and writing

"Silence is often misinterperited, but can never be misquoted."


What I would give to feel free,
and I've already set arrangements for the trade,
but how
selfish of me to yearn this sensation, and I'm afraid
I don't deserve this because it won't come to me.
I won't have that smile in my eyes,
and I won't see the sun shine in my mind.
I know I'm crazy, and cruel on myself,
but all I do is reach and beg for help.

Pathetic phone calls and cries
with words that victimize you
and all that you do.
I just feel so trapped and sore
from breathing like chained and restrained in flames
and the air is getting hotter
and thicker with every gasps of air I collapse.
And on the ground will be where I lay
with no feeling or desire to pray
because looking at the floor I can't help to wonder
"What's it take to be six feet under?"
Maybe in my coffin I'll be free.
Maybe my coffin is where I'm supposed to be.

Those around me
they say they love me.
they tell me they care and that I'm important.
But they don't feel this pain
and they can't hear these voices in my head.
I know I'm worthless.
I know I'm hated and not appreciated.
I don't need to hear your comment,
because trust me, I've already thought it.
I'm no special thing
nor a figment of beauty.
I'm a sad, lost soul with no motivation or purpose.
I am a scrap paper thrown away,
I am a cigarette butt stepped on the ground.
I am a beer bottle shattered against the wall.
I am that headache you take your motrin for.
I am the rain you wipe off your windshield.
I am the vomit you flush away.
I am the cancer you kill,
the anger you build,
and the promises failed.

What I would give to feel free...
free from ill.
I want to hurt myself so bad.
I want to hurt myself so bad.
I want to hurt myself so fucking bad.

I feel so worthless.
I feel so stupid.
I'm stupid.
I'm trying so hard not to hurt myself.
It's so hard.

Tell me everything will be okay.
please please please
someone please tell me everything is going to be okay.
someone tell me that I'm okay.
i need someone.
I someone so desperately right now.
Im shaking so bad.

i need someone.
please help me.
please i need anyone.
please please please
i need someone.
im gonna hurt myself
I'm trying so hard.
I'm trying.
help me.
It's okay to hide my face
behind this person I fake
knees to chest I embrace
numbing pain once ached
worthless breaths I chase
my body lied and raped
every attempt to haste
dead, no need to replace
Mature Content Filter is On
(Contains: sexual themes, violence/gore, strong language and ideologically sensitive material)
To Archangel Gabrielle,

My head is starting to hurt. I cry a lot more but I keep denying letting him go. He doesn’t understand me like I thought he did. He’s so perfect to me, but it turns out he wasn’t who I thought he was. Is that true? Am I supposed to let him go? Was I only there to bring him out and show him there is more out there? Am I just being too emotional? Too stubborn? I love feeling his love. It is the most addicting sensation I have ever experienced. I tell myself that I have felt love before, but my heart overwhelms itself from him. I feel wanted, protected, not alone anymore. All the fights though, what is happening? Is this you trying to talk to me? If so, I need it slapped in the face more because I am still hypnotized by him. Sarah tries to help me hold up my standards. She puts me back in place when I need it. I love her like a lover, I would do anything for her. She says that I deserve a relationship that will do the same back to me. Maybe I’m just a fool. I can’t help but believe that I am only here on this earth to help people, not myself. I feel like hurting myself. I haven’t cut in a while, then I relapsed, but I’m back on track. I don’t hit myself either. He gets mad and disappointed, which makes me want to do it even more. He says it hurts him and he can’t handle it. It’s hard. I think about it everyday. How bad I want to hurt myself. It’s so bad. I feel crazy. I feel worthless. Why would anyone care about me, why, why? Sometimes it’s so bad that I wish I wasn’t cared for, so I didn’t have to worry about disappointing anyone, or end up losing someone. I feel so confused. I don’t want to be touched. These nightmares are tearing me apart. I see Nate and Addison, even Dylan, and I just lie there like a dead piece of meat. Raping me. Over and over. Touching me. Kissing me. Covering my mouth. Pushing my face away. They’re calling me a bitch. A piece of shit. A worthless whore. I can feel them thrusting. I feel them inside me and touching me and taunting me with words. It makes me want to die. I’m just a rag doll. I can’t even do anything. It’s like trying to run but you’re moving slower than molasses. I try reaching but its not far enough. I try pulling but I’m not strong enough. I try screaming but nothing comes out. My studio finals are this week. I wish I could just sleep it away. Just stay in bed sulking and pitying myself. That’d be great. But I’m not that person. I’m scared of what is going to happen. Do you think he’ll leave me? Realize that I’m too much to handle? I feel lost now. What am I supposed to do? My heart is aching from fear. I’m so afraid. What if everything I said before is true? Why do I let myself fall head over heels again. Will he fight for me like before? Will he just think “oh well” and realize I’m not as worth it as he thought? My heart is breaking. I feel myself breaking. I feel like I haven’t even taken my antidepressant today. I can’t help to feel this overwhelm of depression on my back. My back, my neck, my head.  I’m not fucking worth it. I’m not fucking worth it. Just be happy without me.
It's uncontrollable I must confess
that every time I hear you say-
I can't imagine what travels trough your head
the subtle thoughts
the flick of gears
that make you tick
and makes me fear

Say goodbye and give me a reason
to not sit here
like the pathetic child I am
I can hear the laughs echo in my ears
I can feel your heart beat faster
when you hear her

My stomach wants to vomit
and my eyes want to plead
while my hands must hold back
the yearning to bleed

This wave of grief
is an unbearable relief
how can I put belief
into a thief

Precious, delicate, vulnerable
and pitiful girl I am.
They reveal my naked body
and they beat beat beat
me with their hands
and their words

Is it so hard to love

For what I deserve I do not
and the dark of my stomach may match the bruises
I wish I could not
wish to could not
wish to be not.
Although she chose to let me go
I know my mommy loves me so
I can feel it in my heart
With me she can't bear to part
But if she chose to let me live
Her future she would have to give
But someday it will be my turn
to grow and live and love and learn
Though my body will be gone
You'll feel me in the air at dawn
Whispering that I will wait
Patiently for my chance at fate
My soul will be here when you're ready
When our future is safe and steady
then to term you'll carry me
and discover who I grow to be.


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Add a Comment:
FrozenJinga Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2014  Student General Artist
ghearradh Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2013
thank you thank you thank you so so much for watching me! i really appreciate it! :hug:
QuietLikeSnow Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2013  Student Photographer
of course
williamfdevault Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank you for the fave on Mandela's Chariot. :blackrose:
QuietLikeSnow Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2013  Student Photographer
no problem
williamfdevault Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2013  Professional Writer
Oops, I meant "thick penetration" (Nice to see someone likes this one!)
schzimmyDearr Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
thanks for the fav. and If you liked it, then you can join my page on :facebook: - [link] I would appreciate (:
JPtHart Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2012  Student Photographer
A belated thanks for the favourite. :aww:
QuietLikeSnow Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2012  Student Photographer
no problem at all
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